


Everything that's left

by orphan_account



Category: JO1 (Japan Band)
Genre: Character Study (?), Dancing, Drabble, Introspection, Other, i was just very sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-15
Updated: 2020-03-15
Packaged: 2021-02-28 16:40:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23160340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Shosei has always loved dancing, and he'll always do so. Because it's the only thing he has.
Relationships: None
Comments: 1
Kudos: 3





	Everything that's left

Shosei loved dancing.  
He always did.  
It had been his way to express himself, in both happy and sad times, whenether he felt overwhelmed with his feelings he'd just turn on some music and dance, expressing all of his confused emotions through the movements.  
It made him feel better.  
Because it was the only thing he could always do.  
When he felt like he was completly alone, when he was losing everything, when his whole world was breaking apart, the only thing that was always left was dancing.  
So he danced again, expressing everything without fear.

At some point in his life people started praising him - not only his family, but also his friends and people that just knew him. They told him that his way of expressing emotion was very beautiful, very touching, very relatable.  
All that cheered him up and he started dreaming of becoming a performer, of reaching more people, maybe he could do something good for them like dancing did for himself.

And when he turned 16, he got a chance, and he grabbed it and went to study in a famous dance acdemy in the United States for a few months. That time would become very important to him, he met many people like himself, and he was able to learn a lot from them.  
But most of all, he found himself, his own self in his dancing, the core of the confused emotions he always enacted.  
And with his soul in sync, he could aim even higher. He made it his speciality to free-style to any kind of music, from rock to piano ballads, from hip-hop to jazz. He just went with what he felt and expressed it, always remembering his core, always staying true to himself.  
Dancing then was like dreaming. He just moved for a few minutes, feeling and acting out everything, and when he opened his eyes, there was applause as he bowed and thanked the audience for watching.

After he became an adult, he started performing. First in front of small, then with each time bigger audiences. He felt happy, knowing that his name spread well, as the "free-style dancer full of emotion ".  
It was during that time when he was performing in a mediocre club, he was collaborating with a band for his performance, a band he has never heard of. But he threw himself into it like always, and when the heavy rock sound accompied by the singer's voice started to echo, it echoed throughout his whole body, making it move and enacting the story of the song played.

And suddenly it was over again, it felt like it had been just a second, and there was applause. It always went like that.

Yes, it always went like that. Shosei expressed so much, and he got praised, loved, adored, but in himself nothing of that was left. He wondred when it had started, when he had started losing himself. The thing he loved to do had become a monster that endlessly exhausted his ability to feel, but Shosei didn't want that to be his reality. But he couldn't deny the truth.  
Even whenever he fell in love himself and was eventually loved back, it was empty, it was shallow, it didn't feel real. "You should take a break from dancing and focus on your own life, your work takes up too much of you.", one of his lovers had said to him.  
Shosei's loves have always been going up and down, between shows and training, between clubs and offices, he met his dates often, but it was never a happy end for him. He wanted to be loved so he could feel love himself, so that he could love back, but there wasn't anything to learn when there was nothing left. That's what all of them told him, how all of them ended it. It was always the same end.

And Shosei always took the same solution. He danced again, it was the only thing he could love, because it was the only way he really felt, the only thing that was always there for him.  
And today he dances too, expressing his feelings to a fragile piano melody, he felt everything, but then it was over, he heard the applause as he bowed down, and of all the emotions he had expressed nothing was left, he was just empty as the curtain closed.  
And he'll soon open the curtain again, dancing wildly on the stage, expressing the feelings of the moment until he was empty again.  
Because it was the only thing he had left.


End file.
